...because there is a little country living in all of us



Tuesday, June 17, 2014

A Moment of Truth

There comes a time in all blog journeys when bloggers are faced with the extremely sensitive question of how personal do I get?  How much do I disclose?  What parts of me do I share with you?  How vulnerable do I allow myself to be here?  I have just reached that fine point in time in my blogging experience and have decided to go for it and share a bit of intense truth with you.  Deep breath.  Ok, here goes!  Please be gentle with me! :)




Big changes are happening over here and we have embarked on a new adventure.  Let me elaborate.  My husband Karl and I have been married almost eight wonderful years and have struggled from the very beginning to have a child.  We desire so strongly to have our own family that it has become a continuous throbbing pain in the very deepest part of our souls.  Oh we are getting very good at hiding it, and can go about our life as if nothing is broken inside, but some days I crumble when I see the hope diminishing from my husband's eyes.  






We have now reached a breaking point, and after spending hours on our knees in prayer for direction, we have come to the realization that the fulfillment of our biggest hope will take big sacrifice.  Thus we decided to put our farmhouse up For Sale by Owner with a plan to rent for a while to save up money for adoption.  AND guess what?  Our house has SOLD already!  Yes, it is bitter sweet and I shall miss this old farmhouse that has become home to us in every sense of the word and, of course, my spacious gardens, and our large barn from which I host my antique barn sales, but sacrifice is sacrifice.  Karl and I are excited to face this new chapter in our lives and move forward!  I will be hosting one last gigantic Antique Barn 'Moving' Sale here this Friday, June 20 from 1 pm to 6 pm and Saturday, June 21 from 9 am to 2 pm.  I have been super busy sorting through our entire house and getting the barn ready for the sale!  I would love to have you stop by and please bring all your friends!  I hope to take a few photos of the sale and post here soon to show you!  I will also be loading up the shop with favorite items that need to move on to better homes as well!




We still aren't sure where to go from here, but through much prayer and a maturing of our faith, we know that we are in Awesome Hands and can feel our Lord's gentle (sometime firm) nudging behind us instructing us in the way that He has laid out.  When we turn to our own way, we crash headfirst into the roadblocks put in our path, but can still feel encouraged that there is a window open somewhere else.  It isn't easy to walk by faith and not by sight, but we know we do not go at it alone.  Whatever happens in the end, we have great peace that God knows what is best for us.




Thank you for letting me open up a bit for you all to peer inside.  I hope I have not scared you away with my moment of truth.  During the next couple weeks as we pack up and move, I might not have time for impressive blog posting, but I will surely keep you all informed throughout our journey and of course the shop will remain open right up to moving day, so please don't stray too far away! :)






Note:  Everything found in the above photos can be purchased in the shop soon or at my upcoming Antique Barn Sale!  Hope to see you there!  :)




30 comments:

  1. What an amazing Woman of God you are! I agree, "trying" to take our own path with no Leader, doesnt end too well and I can only imagine how bittersweet this moment is for you...I have followed you blog what seems like forever =) and simply cannot wait to see your posts of your new journey along the way with your gorgeous photos! Sending prayers your way! xoxo ~Ashley shehimthem.wordpress.com

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  2. Maria,
    you have to follow your heart and the plan God has shown you. A house is just a house in the grand scheme of things no matter how fabulous it is. What makes it a home is the family that lives with in it's walls. There will always be another house but family is everything for always. You are embarking on a tough but wonderful journey which will be so rewarding in the end. I truly believe that somewhere there is a little soul waiting just for you. We all feel privileged to accompany you as your travel down the path God has chosen for you.
    Rebecca

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  3. Prayers for you and your husband as you move into this next exciting chapter in your lives. Accepting what is can be hard, but God's ways are perfect. If I lived close, I would come spend a lot of money at your sale. :-)

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  4. Maria,
    How wonderful that you will be embarking on a new journey. It does not surprise me that your home sold quickly it is gorgeous and someone else will now love it like you did. I am wishing you much happiness and hopefully a new soul for you to love in the near future. Good luck as you embark on this new journey.
    Kris

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  5. Congratulations on the next chapter of your life!
    I wish you much happiness and love and will keep you in my prayers!

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  6. Bonsoir chère Maria,
    Permettez-moi de vous appeler par votre prénom...
    J'ai trouvé votre récit très émouvant et tellement rempli de sagesse. Je suis certaine qu'une maison s'offrira à vous lorsque votre famille se sera agrandie. Elle sera encore plus belle car elle aura des saveurs particulières.
    Je vous souhaite de tout mon coeur tout plein de bonnes choses.


    Gros bisous ❦

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  7. How exciting to be allowed to be on this journey with you! Our second born daughter adopted sister/brother siblings who are now 11 and 10. What joys they are to our family! Then, after 13 years of marriage and never conceiving, surprise! We now have a 1 month old grandson as well!

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  8. Wishing you all the very best on the next leg of your journey!

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  9. Dear Maria,

    I wish hope and pray for your new chapters. You have it all in perspective and proper priority when you keep your faith's foot forward.

    I wish you every best. Thank you for sharing with us.

    Hugs and love,

    Michele

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  10. Maria, thank you for sharing the most tender parts of yourself with us. This will give your readers a chance to pray specifically for you and Karl. :) God bless you as you both begin this new chapter of your lives. xox

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  11. Oh Maria....you say it yourself...God know what is the best for you.....he is with you always.....so exciting news......stay close to Him darling.......love from me.....i will pray for you ......love Ria...x !

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  12. Such big changes in your life, Maria. I'm praying for you and your husband - God has a plan He will reveal. I wish you the best with your barn sale and move. :)

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  13. Blessings to you as you walk this new and exciting path!

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  14. Oh my prayers will be with you as you start this new journey. I hope the Lord puts the perfect little one in your arms soon.

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  15. I know you and Karl's self-sacrifice will result in much joy and peace as you follow the Lord's nudging. It's an exciting and sometimes scary journey to live by faith and not by sight, but knowing God is in control calms our fears. Your plan for adoption reminds me that we are also adopted into God's family.
    I'm thrilled to be able to follow along with you all as you keep us posted on your faithful path.
    Mary Alice

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  16. Bless your heart. Hope everything works out for you and Karl.

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  17. This is never an easy decision. My son and daughter-in-law went through something similar. She had a miscarriage,then had my grandson. Then another miscarriage and my grand daughter. Still wanting more children, she had three more miscarriages. They even went to India to use a surrogate. That didn't work so they finally gave up and are grateful that they have two healthy children. Each miscarriage was so emotional.
    I know that God will guide you as you take this journey.
    God bless,
    Bev

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  18. Oh Maria....bless you for deciding to make such a wonderful sacrifice for your dream. Know that if you feel good and comfortable with it...then you ARE in the middle of God's Will for you both. I am excited for you and your husband as you step out on this new journey....and pray that God will pour rich blessings down on you! ♥

    xoxo laurie

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  19. Maria, I have really enjoyed following your blog and your beautiful home in magazines as well. As others have said, a house can be wonderful but even more wonderful are the people who make the family living within. May God bless you in the future following your brave decision and sacrifice. I wish you luck with everything and will keep you and your husband in my thoughts and prayers. Hugs, Diana

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  20. I will be keeping you & Karl in my prayers! What a wonderful reward God has for those who are faithful! You have just encouraged me in my own walk. Reading your story reminds me that we do need to put our full faith & trust in the One whom holds tomorrow. I will be praying that this new chapter in your lives will be filled with many blessings for both of you :-)

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  21. Maria, I just opened up my prayer journal and where I pray for the babies I know... I wrote" Maria and Karl and the baby they will adop"t! I'll be praying for you regularly! Brave and obedient...what a combo!!! God bless you abundantly

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  22. Blessings for your new adventure~~~Trust in the Lord with all your heart, lean not unto your own understanding,but acknowledge him in all thy ways and he will direct your path.......looks like he is directing your path....thank you, Lord! Roxie

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  23. That is wonderful and such exciting news! I will keep you and your hubby in my thoughts and prayers. I will definitely pop in on Friday and hopefully be able to contribute in some small way to your new and very exciting journey!!!

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  24. My youngest daughter & her husband went through a very similar situation and soon as they adopted a very sweet baby 1 day old well in 4 months she was pregnant with her first baby and then another then another . 4 boys now and don't we have fun LOL

    Grandma

    The very best to you and your new family , you will be saving the life of a child

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  25. I have tears falling from this post. I know how hard it is to leave home and gardens that you have put your heart and soul into...and I am glad that for you it is for a happy reason. For me it was not so happy...it was a greedy ex husband that forced us out of our house. I struggle to make where we are a home now, as I miss the one I worked so hard to fix....but it is coming along and more and more it feels a little more like home. I know you will find a place that will be just as fantastic as the one you are leaving behind, as you are among the most talented people I have seen. Congratulations on the new exciting chapter in your lives and best wishes for a smooth, speedy transition!

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  26. I am happy that you shared. As a blogger myself, I hate it when others keep themselves and their lives hidden. I respect that, but I want to know the person and share the struggle and send good karma. I'm sure you will have your little one before you know it.
    Brenda

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  27. I think it is wonderful that you are following your heart! You will always have the sweet memories of your wonderful farmhouse and soon you will be creating new fabulous ones. Adopting a child will be an answered prayer and I wish you both the best!
    hugs,
    Jann

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  28. Hi Maria,
    Just found this post after reading something from Pinterest that led me here. Amazing, eh? ANYWAY, I have been in your shoes and they are not easy steps. As you can see, God's way is the BEST way and I only know this because I am on the other side now, the proud Mama of a five year old. Our story is different but the feelings are the same. Happy for you in your decision!

    Jillian
    Bella Rosa Antiques

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  29. sehr schöne dekoration!!! ich mag die grünen gläser!!! alles liebe von angie

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  30. Maria, I wish I lived closer to you to have been able to shop at your sale! I applaud you in your decision to follow God's nudge. I wish you and Karl all the best in your journey and praise you for your honesty. Walk by faith and not by sight is my favorite passage...

    big hugs....

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Thank you for stopping by! I love hearing from you and appreciate all of your comments. It's a treat to read each one!
Love,
Maria

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